Green Daily

Unless you spent the last couple days hiding from your TV, your radio, your phone and your computer, you're probably aware that Gov Eliot Spitzer is in big trouble. Roughly $80,000 worth of trouble, in fact. He was caught arranging meetings with high class hookers, and the subsequent investigation revealed over six years of schmoozing with call girls -- really, really expensive ones. Now he's resigned.

While I could get on my moral high horse about a married public servant paying for sex with prostitutes, what I'm more worried about is the effect these repeated indiscretions have on the environment. So pay attention, planet-lovers, here's five reasons you shouldn't fornicate with strangers for money.

• Extra travel: Sure, you're probably only traveling locally for your illicit encounters, but unless you get from home, to the motel and back again on a bike, it's still not carbon neutral. Plus, Spitzer was paying for his ladies to fly to DC from New York every time he needed some hanky panky. That's at least .02 tons of CO2 each way.
  

• Hotels: Even if you're not married, chances are you don't do the nasty at your house (what would the neighbors think?) -- and hotels are huge energy wasters (plus I'm sure Spitzer isn't renting by the hour).
  

• Conspicuous consumption: According to some experts, the same insecurities that would drive a man to drop tens of thousands of dollars on a little manufactured love, will also drive him to buy lots of unnecessary crap to impress his lady friends. Unless Spitzer is buying these call girls biodegradable bling, it's bad for the planet.

• The money: This one is obvious, but seriously -- $80,000 for sex. I'm sure it comes cheaper than that, and just think of what Spitzer could have spent that money on. Why not outfit the Governor's Mansion with solar cells, or put a little wind turbine in the backyard? Hell, 80-grand worth of carbon offsets would've been better than tossing it down the drain like that.
  

• The political backlash: Worst of all, now that this news has gone public, the Governor's progressive work for the environment (and everything else to do with his career) will almost certainly go down the tubes. $26 million for recycling programs? Awesome! $23.5 million for environmental protection? Great! $80,000 for the horizontal mambo? You're fired!

Green-ify Your Sex Life